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bebe_gurl
Global Moderator
Christmas Island
4520 Posts |
Posted - 06/12/2005 : 9:53:52 PM
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Resort person and other boob-tube booboos
HOST: HOW can the government generate more money next year?
Guest: There are many ways, but one important is to improve the touristic industry! (Just pretend we never asked you, OK?)
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Host: Is (name of celebrity) a member of your group’s organizing committee?
Guest: No, but we may invite him as a resort person. (Ay, a resort person!)
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Host: How did you end up making so much money in your new venture?
Guest: Well, I guess by luck. It was a chance opportunity we saw and grabbed it! (Ano daw?)
* * *
Host: What’s your favorite cuisine?
Guest: Oh, I love Filipino food—like pancit and lumpiang shanghai! (Ah, so!)
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Host: What’s your reaction to all the nasty rumors spread against you by your rival?
Guest: I don’t really pay attention—it’s, what do you call, a lot of boo-ha-ha? (No, that’s not what you call it!)
* * *
Host: Did you direct the sex comedy play?
Guest: Well, I helped conceptualize it, but no, I had nothing to do with it directorilly. (Ay, directorilly!)
* * *
Host: How do you make this marinade taste so good?
Guest: All you need to do is, ipahiga ang isang kalamansi. (Ano daw?)
* * *
Host: What did you do during the huge traffic jam?
Guest: I left my car and rode a public! (No comment.)
* * *
Host: Why is the country’s political situation so bad these days?
Guest: Siguro, lahat ng ito ay gawain ng mga taong hunger for power.
(Ah, please repeat?)
* * *
Host: How do you apply a coat of paint so that it’s smooth when it dries?
Guest: You just try to keep it stable so it doesn’t dwarf? (Dwarf? What dwarf?—Oh, warp!)
* * *
Host: You’re being attacked left and right these days—honestly, how do you feel?
Guest: Honestly, I’m already repainting why I became a government official! (“Repaint” all you want, it comes with the territory!)
* * *
Host: Why is saying “I’m sorry” so important in a troubled relationship?
Guest: Because, once you say you’re sorry, that means you have a regret! (Brilliant insight—duh?)
* * *
Host: Was your father religious?
Guest: Not before—but later, na-convert siya sa Katolasismo. (Katol—ano?!)
* * *
Host: What animals would you like the Manila Zoo to acquire and why?
Guest: Sana, giant panda. I hear giant pandas are really rare as far as their breathing goes! (What are you talking about?!)
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 =Cry for ANY and EVERY reason.. sometimes, it feels good to cry..= |
Edited by - bebe_gurl on 06/12/2005 9:55:58 PM |
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malaine
Global Moderator
Saint Barthelemy
6003 Posts |
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see-j
Diamond Star
China
447 Posts |
Posted - 07/12/2005 : 11:13:19 AM
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____________________
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malaine
Global Moderator
Saint Barthelemy
6003 Posts |
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GeRbEr4aDuLtS
Superstar
1719 Posts |
Posted - 10/12/2005 : 3:41:54 PM
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hehe. (period)
"Wisdom enters not a malicious mind, as well as Love enters not a selfish heart."
~anonymous |
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ioj
Global Moderator
Qatar
697 Posts |
Posted - 10/12/2005 : 3:49:12 PM
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| ano daw? |
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GeRbEr4aDuLtS
Superstar
1719 Posts |
Posted - 10/12/2005 : 4:22:46 PM
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nakikitawa lang ako kuya.
"Wisdom enters not a malicious mind, as well as Love enters not a selfish heart."
~anonymous |
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bebe_gurl
Global Moderator
Christmas Island
4520 Posts |
Posted - 10/12/2005 : 9:39:52 PM
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d kc naintindihan ni gerber kya nakikitwa n lang
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=Cry for ANY and EVERY reason.. sometimes, it feels good to cry..= |
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GeRbEr4aDuLtS
Superstar
1719 Posts |
Posted - 11/12/2005 : 3:50:07 PM
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hindi ko talaga naintindihan kasi barok yung english na yan eh 
"Wisdom enters not a malicious mind, as well as Love enters not a selfish heart."
~anonymous |
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tripple20501
Star Light
Saudi Arabia
13 Posts |
 Posted - 13/12/2005 : 12:58:30 PM
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Chinese speaking to a Chinese operator, no comments read for your self.
Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan ?
Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.
Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!
Operator: You are talking to someone! Who is this?
Caller: I'm Sum Wan .And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.
Operator: I know u are someone and u want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?
Caller: Well just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother,Noe Wan was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.
Operator: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital from the accident that isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!
Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?
Operator: I'm Saw Lee.
Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!
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malaine
Global Moderator
Saint Barthelemy
6003 Posts |
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bebe_gurl
Global Moderator
Christmas Island
4520 Posts |
Posted - 13/12/2005 : 10:02:36 PM
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hohoho
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=Cry for ANY and EVERY reason.. sometimes, it feels good to cry..= |
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boisaudi
Diamond Star
Saudi Arabia
211 Posts |
Posted - 14/12/2005 : 1:57:39 PM
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buwaaaaaaaahahahhaha..
P.U.S.H Pray Until Something Happen |
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bebe_gurl
Global Moderator
Christmas Island
4520 Posts |
Posted - 14/12/2005 : 9:58:29 PM
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bwehehehe
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=Cry for ANY and EVERY reason.. sometimes, it feels good to cry..= |
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ioj
Global Moderator
Qatar
697 Posts |
Posted - 15/12/2005 : 07:46:30 AM
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VERY INTERESTING.......
YEAR 1981
1. PRINCE CHARLES GOT MARRIED
2. LIVERPOOL CROWNED CHAMPIONS OF EUROPE
3. AUSTRALIA LOST THE ASHES
4. POPE DIED
YEAR 2005
1. PRINCE CHARLES GOT MARRIED
2. LIVERPOOL CROWNED CHAMPIONS OF EUROPE
3. AUSTRALIA LOST THE ASHES
4. POPE DIED
IN FUTURE, IF PRINCE CHARLES DECIDES TO RE-MARRY .... PLEASE WARN THE
POPE!!
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Joke Time!!!
